Miller Open

The Greater Miller Open Spring 1997

Paul J Miller

Well, another Miller invitational is in the record books and although the turnout was less than usual (mostly due to the short notice on my part) BT still made its presence known. The original foursome of Millsy, Mr. Kent, Robb and Jake sort of crumbled when Jake had to work ( I’m still trying to understand that oxyMORON) and Kent’s kids got sick when Ann Marie was away and he bagged. So it was up to the "Bile Brothers" of ole to carry the torch. A third was player was added (Richard - another government contractor for the Navy) and we completed "TEAM BUD."

It was time to punctuate this event with some rules - not sissy-boy crap of usual tournaments. The TEAM BUD tablets from on high read something like this;

1st Commandment of the day "Thou shall be in excess of 200 pounds." The second commandment came naturally " Thou shall never have an empty beer can." The third commandment states "Thou shall never have an unlit cigar." Unlike Moses, our perfect world really only needed these three!!!

Here are the event statistics:

Sunny; light wind and 70 degrees
Robb’s luggage = 4 twelve packs
Team captain = the Budweiser cooler
Beer consumed before the tourney = 10
Beer’s consumed during the round = 30
3 packs of cigars inhaled

Highlight Reel

1) My attempt from the water (3rd hole): the ball was on a mud bar about 5 feet into the hazard; shoes off and up to my shins in muck, flailing at ball. After our penalty stroke, Richard’s subsequent "seeing eye pitch" through the trees to within 5 feet.

2) Robb’s 40 foot birdie putt: After being given the Video Camera to document our round. I lied on the green directly behind the hole with the camera and captured the amazing put on video. The victory dance was obscene!

3) Robb not allowing me to ride between holes so Robb and Richard could use their carts to herd me like Australian cutting dogs.

4) Robb playing "golf polo" down the fairways.

5) Make shift Garbage Plates made from pork & beans, hot dogs, mustard and raw onions.

6) The commitment to have another Miller Invitational.

The best news of all is that we already have the date picked out for the next outing.

Date: September 19, 1997
Time: Afternoon (specifics depend on turnout)
Price: $40-$55
Where: Either Hickory Heights, in PA or Oakmont, in MD
Details to follow:

Hey no complaints about lack of notification. I will be updating you the 19th of every month from now until then. The details will become more firm with each email so put it in INK in the old day-timer and take the day off - Golf with the Brothers!! Teams are welcome too so call all non-bates and start getting the interest up---no money now

I welcome your Questions and Comments.

Paul J Miller This page was last updated June 1, 1997

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